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It’s true — the sight of a foreign woman and Chinese boyfriend or Chinese husband is much rarer than its counterpart, the foreign man and Chinese woman.
If you go to any major city in China, you will invariably run into the foreign man-Chinese woman pairings in any major tourist or shopping destination; not so with foreign women and Chinese men.
Still, despite the odds, sterotypes and other barriers, it does happen that Chinese men and foreign women get together.
It happened for me — and a growing number of other women, including bloggers such as the Local Dialect, The Downtown Diner, and Wo Ai Ni.
On occasion, it even creeps into the news, like this story.
For now, though, I’m just happy to have John, my Chinese husband, in my life.
I don’t doubt he loved me in the beginning — but once his family knew, I suspect they made it clear that there was no future in what we had.
Even my own husband was first told by his parents that he could be friends with a foreign girl, but not date her.
On the other hand, there are Chinese men — and their families — who would be happy to have a foreign woman in the family. For example, my good friend in Hangzhou, Xiao Yu, once told me that some Chinese men cannot overcome their feeling of inferiority — that being an American girl, a citizen of one of the most powerful countries in the world, made my presence somewhat intimidating.
According to Xiao Yu, some Chinese men could never believe that such a girl would become their one and only. A driver who took me to the Beijing Airport this summer admitted he once had a Russian girlfriend when he was a college student.
But he said he was never able to satisfy her (yes, in way), so they parted.
I don’t know why, but most girls I talked with online and in Phnom Penh could actually talk to me. There are a lot of beautiful girls and many of them are single.
They dream about their Western prince, but he never comes.